February 5th, 2015

Spike - Always Alone

At Long Last I Get A Few Minutes!

I am on Dad's pc writing this, but can't always get a signal as his router is not all that great ... until this last few weeks it wasn't worth replacing as Dad no longer uses the pc at all.  So that's why with all the time at M&D's I don't often get the internet when I actually have the time to sit down for a few minutes.

Sadly mum is not really coping ... very tired and depressed ... but wont get help, as she wont have people "telling her what to do" . She is upset with me as I spent last night in Exeter as I had treatment ...I needed to sleep after treatment, but that was not popular, however I persevered ... even though it meant she hadn't taken any tablets this morning. She has taken some for years but now there are less she wont take them, even though I have bought a weekly pot for her.  She is also finding herself with less tolerance for Dad's Alzheimer's ... and to make matters worse he has had a bad few days.  I think he relaxed when she came home, but relaxed too much!

Tim popped in to see them this afternoon for 1/2 hour, and Mum was so pleased to see him.  She was very foccussed and animated .. sad to say I find that very hard to cope with as it's good to know she is happy, but hard to be the one left to pick up the pieces.  He doesn't realise (neither does Nick) how tough life has been.  I am sure if I attempted to say anything, as well as the tears from me, there would be a disbelief and a protest of exageration from them.

Sorry to have that mini rant but I need to tell someone - and a few of you have been so supportive of me ... that has truly meant more than you can imagine.

I managed to go to work for a couple of days this week - although I commuted from here, so tired, but at least I got a few hours of "sanity"!

So, my house is a tip ... and I still have the Christmas Decs up as I just haven't had the time - by the time I have a moment it will be ready to re-decorate for next Christmas! Maybe I could start a new fashion!

Oh well I had better get back into the living room - mum moans that she is lonely.

Hope you are all keeping well - have I missed any vital news?  I do hope I can get back to regular LJ time soon.