There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a really big, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.
"Well, whatcha gonna do about it?" he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears.
"Come on, man," the biker says, "I didn't think you'd CRY. I can't stand to see a man crying."
"This is the worst day of my life," I say. "I'm a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don't have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my old lady in bed with the gardener, and then my dog bit me. So I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all, I buy a drink, drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve. Then you, show up and drink the whole thing!
But enough about me, how's your day going?"
Two Ladies Talking in Heaven
1st woman: Hi! Wanda.
2nd woman: Hi! Sylvia. How'd you die?
1st woman: I froze to death.
2nd woman: How horrible!
1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died apeaceful death. What about you?
2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.
1st woman: So, what happened?
2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking.. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.
1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive..
Yes, jaded_jamie is one of the nicest people I know - he was squeeeeeeeeing about a new computer programme that he now has ... and look what arrived by "return-of-comment".
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I now have the hard task of deciding which to put on my profile - although it will prbably be the middle one of the 2, what do you think?
Suishes you hard, Jamie - you are the bestest, thank you for being such a great friend.
I have 2 more pictures from the lovely jaded_jamie
Thank you so, so much.
Day 01 - Sequel that should not have been made ... The Trail of the Pink Panther
Day 02 - Movie that you think more people should see ... Still to decide - LOL
Day 03 - Favorite Oscar-nominated movie from most recent ballot ... Pride and Prejudice
Day 04 - Movie that makes you laugh every time ... Pride and Prejudice
Day 04 - Movie that makes you laugh every time ... Carry On, Up The Khyber
Day 05 - Movie you loathe ... Meet The Spartans
Day 06 - Movie that makes you cry every time ... Gone With The Wind
Day 07 - Least favorite movie by a favorite actor or actress ... P.S. I Love You
Day 08 - Movie that should be required high school viewing ... Gallipoli ...&... All Quiet On The Western Front
Day 09 - Best scene ever ... Pellet with the Poison, from The Court Jester
Day 10 - A movie you thought you wouldn't like but ended up loving ... Lethal Weapon
Day 11 - A movie that disappointed you ... Twilight
Day 12 - Best soundtrack/background music in a scene ... Snow White ... & ... Prince of Egypt
Day 14 - Favorite film in black and white ... Some Like It Hot
Day 15 - Best musical - Guys & Dolls
Day 16 - Your guilty pleasure movie ... Still to decide - LOL
Day 17 - Favorite series of related movies - Star Wars
Day 18 - Favorite title sequence ... Operation Peticoat
Day 19 - Best movie cast ... Around the World in 80 Days
Day 20 - Favorite kiss ... To Catch a Thief
Day 21 - Favorite romantic couple ... Groucho & Margaret ... and ... Fred & Ginger
Day 22 - Favorite final scene/line ... Some like It Hot
Day 23 - Best explosion or action scene ... Lethal Weapon 3
Day 24 - Quote you use most often ... "Wind & Rain ... from The Longest Day
Day 25 - A movie you plan on watching (old or new) ... Mamma Mia
Day 26 - Freakishly weird movie ending ... Still to decide - LOL
Day 27 - Best villain ... Arsenic and Old Lace
Day 28 - Most overhyped movie ... E.T.
Day 29 - Movie you have watched more than ten times
Most of the films listed above that I say I like are ones that I've seen more than 10 times ... I can watch something twice in a day if I'm enjoying it ... weird, I know!
So, it was hard to pick just one film and in the end I chose a Danny Kaye film, Wonder Man , for the simple reason that when I was in New York in 1989 we travelled to Brooklyn ... and stood on a bridge in Prospect Park, very similar to the one in the film (at about 3 mins!) It's a fun film, where he palys twins, one is a nerd,a nd one an entertainer.
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