March 15th, 2010


True Friendship

I have just received this e-mail ... And had to share it with you.

Some of you really do come into this catagory, but for all us, it is good to be able to think of the special people in our lives, and to be thankful.

No insult meant to any Scots on my list, but for those in the rest of the world, they are known for their truth and their candid way of speaking!

True Friendship... SCOTTISH STYLE!! (None of that Sissy shite)

Are ye tired of those piss weak 'friendship' poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here are a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship... You will see no cute wee smiley faces on this card….. Just the stone cold truth of a great friendship.

1. When ye are sad -- I will help you get pissed and plot revenge against the bastard who made ye sad.

2. When ye are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking ye.

3. When ye smile -- I will know ye are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.

4. When ye are scared -- I will shake the piss out of ye every chance I get, until you're NOT.

5. When ye are worried -- I will tell ye stories about how much worse it could be until YE STOP WHINING!

6... When yer confused -- I will try to use only wee words.

7... When ye are sick -- Stay the fuck away from me until ye are well again.I don't want whatever ye've got.

8... When ye fall, I will laugh my effin head off at you, you clumsy arse, .......but I'll help you up.

9... This is my oath.... I pledge it to the end.

'Why?' you may ask;  Because you are my friend.

Friendship is like pissing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth...


Monday Morning MEME

While I'm waiting for a patient to arrive, I thought I would just do this meme that I have snagged from slaymesoftly  and kazzy_cee 

I hope that you all had a good weekend, and for those in England that you are enjoying the sun ... and for all of us, whatever the weather, we may feel happy as this week starts to unfold.

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Psychiatrists vs. Bartender

Psychiatrists vs. Bartender

Ever since I was a child, I've always had a fear of someone under my bed at night. So I went to a shrink and told him

'I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy.'

'Just put yourself in my hands for one year,' said the shrink. 'Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears..'

'How much do you charge?' 'Eighty dollars per visit,' replied the doctor. 'I'll sleep on it,' I said.

Six months later the doctor met me on the street. 'Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?' he asked.

'Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money! A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought a new car!'

'Is that so!' With a haughty attitude he said, 'and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?'

'He told me to cut the legs off the bed! - Ain't nobody under there now!!!'

Ignore the shrinks; go have a drink and talk to your bartender.

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